Kenshin's Beauty Parlor
by Microphone
Summary: Slightly Alternate Universe. Many things are held inside Kenshin's Beauty Parlor. Angry Kaoru's, confused Sano's, and random chants from Moulin Rouge! Give it a chance. It's Crazy. *Chapter 3 is ACTUALLY up!*
1. Default Chapter

Kenshin's Beauty Parlour

A/N: Please review and read my other stories, then review again. Thanks in advance! Please take note that this fanfic is REALLY out of character. And I made her say "oro" for entertainment and because she lives with the guy.

Kaoru walked down the street. She paused to look at different shops. When she passed Kenshin's Beauty Parlour she did a double take.

''Oro? Kenshin never said he owned a beauty parlour." Kaoru thought. She walked inside, a computer said (with virtual excitement):

"Welcome to Kenshin's Beauty Parlour, this _single_ man has perfected many women. Welcomed marriage proposals." Kaoru's face turned maroon. 

Kenshin walked out.

"May I help you attractive miss?" he said. Then he opened his eyes, he saw Kaoru standing there he turned and ran into the back room. Kaoru stormed after him and punched down the door.

Kaoru stared at Kenshin who was crouching in a corner with his hands over his head.

"Please, do not kill me!!!!!" Kenshin pleaded. "I was bored, that I was, so I made a beauty parlor!"

"Uh hu, Do you think that I will buy that!?!?!?" Kaoru screamed.

"N-n-n-n-n-n-n-n--n--n-n-n-n-not ex-x-x-xx-x-x-x-x-x-x-x-x-x-x-actly," Kenshin stuttered.

"You sound like a clown, YOU DORK!" Kaoru yelled.

"The duke is a dork!" Kenshin exclaimed, raising his pointer finger, he was obviously pleased with himself.

"Yes, The duke _is _a DORK!" Kaoru said in some sort of thinking position.

Kenshin and Kaoru proceed to recite the poem known as "The Duke is a Dork".

Sanosuke (who actually planned the dumb parlor thingy), came out of the back room and looked at the two in front of him. He sweatdropped.

"You know Kenshin, Jou-chan, too much Moulin Rouge can be bad for you." Sano said to them matter-of-factly.

Kenshin and Kaoru blinked and stared at Sano.

"So?" They said in unison.

"Shouldn't we get back to the STORY?!?!" Sano asked them angrily.

"Later," Kenshin said. "Kaoru and I still need to finish the poem, that we do."

Kaoru nods.

Kenshin and Kaoru go back to reciting the poem.

Sano sweatdrops. "This'll be…awhile."


	2. Chapter 2

Chapter 2

AFTER Kenshin and Kaoru had finished reciting "The Duke is a Dork", 

"_20 times _may I add!" Sano yelled, very unhappily.

Kaoru and Kenshin scowled at Sano, who growled back at them.

Just then, Saitou (yes, Saitou), burst through the door and yelled "SHHHEEEE'S CONFESSSSING!!!!!!!!"

Sano then turned to him and asked, "What?"

"Megumi suddenly had the urge to go to another doctor…and…and confess her mistakes."

"On WHAT?"

"Well…duh, her most recent operation!"

Kenshin cringed. "Ouch…I feel sorry for that patient, that I do."

Sano and Saitou ignored Kenshin's comment and kept on doing what they were doing.

"What do you take me for, Saitou, an IMBECILE?"

Saitou walked up to Sano and whispered something else about Megumi into his ear.

Sano's eyes nearly popped out of his head. " I DO???"

Saitou nodded.

"Wow…fox is smart! But oh well!"

Sano and Saitou start singing "Like a Virgin" (and are doing the choreography from Moulin Rouge of course.)

Suddenly Kenshin and Kaoru were in little waiter and waitress uniforms and were dancing around Sano and Saitou with little…tablecloths.

After they had finished the choreography, Kenshin and Kaoru collapsed to the ground, breathing heavily.

Saitou threw the little tablecloth thingy off of his head and walked out of Kenshin's Beauty Parlour.

Sano blinked and said, "Oi…I guess I'VE been watching too much Moulin Rouge too."

Kaoru, still breathing heavily, announced to YOU, the READER, "That is all for now."

And Kenshin added, "That it is…."


	3. Chapter 3 Finally

Kenshin's Beauty Parlour

Chapter 3

After the interference of Saitou and Sano's "Lovely" song, Kaoru and Kenshin sit down to eat lunch. After they finished eating, they got another surprise as Jin'eh comes bursting through the door and shouts dramatically,

"THE BLACK RIDERS ARE COMING!"

Sano, Kenshin and Kaoru look at big tooth man with quizzical looks on their faces before...

"I see trees of green, red roses too, I see them bloom, for me and you, and I think to myself, What a wonderful world.......," Jin'eh sang, when he realized nobody appeared to be clapping, he struck up a new song,

"Red and Yellow and Pink and Green, purple and orange and blue, I can sing a rainbow *claps* sing a rainbow *claps* sing a rainbow too. Listen with your eyes, listen with your eyes, you can sing everything you see, I can sing a rainbow *claps* sing a rainbow *claps* sing along with me. Red and yellow and pink and green purple and orange and blue, we can sing a rainbow * claps *, sing a rainbow * claps *, sing along with me… Hawaiian rainbow, it seems to me, you spread your colors, across the sea, Hawaiian rainbow your song is true, you spread your colors, form green to blue!" After that, he marched right out of that shop with a dark look at everybody and muttered,

"Nobody likes my singing," he started to wail like a baby and ran away.

"Well, that was...............different," Kenshin observed. Kaoru nodded and also observed,

"The sky is purple, the sea is pink, and that song was very stupid,"

"In this order, Wrong, wrong and very accurate," Sano said dumbly.

" Wow, Sano-chan, you learned a new word!" Kenshin exclaimed.

"SANO-CHAN!?!?!?!?!?!?!? AAARRRGGGGHHH!" Sano screeched. As a direct result of the screech, Kaoru's ears fell off. It did not amuse her. Kenshin picked up her ears and attempted to super glue them back on, even though they were upside down. Kaoru, again, was not amused, Sano was. Kaoru marched right on out of the beauty parlour and yelled,

"Why can't you people keep your feet on the ground," She attempted to continue her marching but she tripped over her foot and twisted her ankle. Kenshin and Sano ignored this. Kenshin did Sano's hair. Sano now has pigtails with pink ribbons. Kenshin now has no hair. Kenshin is not amused, Sano and Kaoru are amused. A French horn materializes out of nowhere. Kenshin picks it up and blows a loud, obnoxious note, I mean, sound in their ears. Kaoru's ears fall off, again.

"The end for now," Kenshin says calmly.

"What was that?" Sano asks. 


End file.
